Other Side of 50

Caregiver guilt is one of those quiet feelings that rarely gets named out loud, yet so many people carry it. It shows up in small moments - a thought that lingers after you leave a loved one’s home, a second-guessing of a decision, a subtle feeling that no matter what you’re doing, it’s not [...]

It started with a missed appointment—something small enough to brush off, yet just unusual enough to stay with her. My friend Mary has always been organized, the one who keeps track of everything. So when she forgot a long-standing lunch, she told herself it was simply a busy week. But when it happened again—a [...]

At some point, many of us hear the same phrase after an X-ray or MRI: “You have degenerative changes.” It sounds ominous, and when you hear it - especially in connection with your spine - it can feel unsettling. I heard those words recently myself. After several weeks of discomfort in my neck and [...]

Every so often someone will say to me, “My friend asked me to be their power of attorney,” or “I’ve been asked to serve as a trustee.” Usually, the question that follows is simple: Should I do it? The answer, of course, depends. Sometimes it is one of the most meaningful ways we can [...]

My mom is 92 and, remarkably, still pretty independent. She lives in her own home. She reads. She cooks. She putters. She watches her shows. She still insists she’s “fine.” And in many ways, she is. But aging has a way of turning even “fine” into a team sport. There are three of us [...]

Recently, a friend shared something with me that quietly broke my heart for him. His wife has advanced Alzheimer’s. She lives in a care community now. She no longer recognizes him. Their conversations are brief. Sometimes she smiles at him the way she might smile at any kind visitor. Their shared jokes, their history, [...]

I recently had a routine dental visit turn into something much bigger. What began as a simple replacement of an old filling quickly escalated into a crown - $450 out of pocket - followed by pain when I drank cold beverages, and the unwelcome news that the same tooth now required a root canal. [...]

I recently attended a gathering of local nonprofit CEOs to talk openly about the unprecedented challenges our organizations are facing today — from tightening budgets and workforce capacity concerns to the growing needs in our communities. While the conversation surfaced many real and pressing challenges, there was also a bright and hopeful theme that [...]

I’m going to begin this column with two simple, everyday observations, both shaped by my experience as an older adult navigating our community. One happens behind the wheel. The other happens on foot. Let’s start with driving. My dry cleaner, bank, and coffee shop are all in the same strip mall. It’s a familiar [...]

Many people assume that cities fund most older adult services. In reality, they do not. Programs like Meals on Wheels, caregiver support, transportation assistance, home safety modifications, and senior protection usually begin with federal funding, and then flow through the State of California, who then sends it to the county level where grants are [...]